[tittat]

I think this would be a good topic for crossfire.
Love marriage or arranged marriage, which one do you prefer? And why?

I may go for Love marriage.
What about you?

[azzeccal]

We are in 2008!!It really exist yet arrange marriage?? I think that i will marry with the girl i love!!It impossible to me to stay with a girl only for cash or anything else!!may be sex..:-)
Did anyone marry for cash or sex??
I hope no!

[opine4me]

I think people in western cultures can be overly critical of the concept of arranged marriage. I know people that have had arranged marriages and it has actually worked out very well for them. I'm not saying I'm about to go get MYSELF into one, or that people who don't believe in arranged marriage should be forced into them... but if two young people are OK with the general idea of an arranged marriage and it is simply the choice of partner that is arranged by their families, I think that can work out fine.

The main advantage of arranged marriage is that the mindset going into it is devoid of the unrealistic expectation of eternal happiness that goes into a lot of western marriages. Two people meet, are strongly attracted to each other and get emotionally attached, and our American mindset encourages them to think that this means they will be happy together forever. But the data show that this is simply not the case... after 5 or 10 or 20 years, the feeling often fades and you end up with half of the marriages ending in divorce.

In contrast, with an arranged marriage, at least there is the fact that someone (the parents) is thinking rationally in terms of long-term compatibility and stability, rather than short-term bliss. You pay a little up front in these marriages in terms of not always having that initial excitement, but after 20-30 years I think oftentimes people in arranged marriages are just as happy with their situation, or happier, than people in non-arranged marriages of similar duration.

All that said, I'm sure in arranged-marriage societies bad matches are made all the time. But bad matches are also made all the time when people choose their own partners. So overall, I think we Americans give the arranged marriage societies a bad rap. I've never seen statistics on marital happiness at the 25-year mark in arranged versus non-arranged marriages, but I bet those data would be pretty illuminating...

[bnex10]

I rather marry someone i love instead of marrying just for money or whatever.

[fempower]

Love marriage for me. Why would you want to be fully and completely linked to someone who isn't of your own choosing? Financially, emotionally, sexually, etc linked to someone when even many love marriages end in divorce? I met a girl who had a marriage arranged for her (in high school; the marriage would take place soon after her graduation. She seemed like a happy person; until she talked about the arranged marriage. No one is planning my future except for me.

[shauncar]

L O V E

[Twinkie]

I believe a love marriage is the only way to go. Having an arranged marriage is like having a life long business partner.
How can someone get up every morning, hating the person sleeping with them???

~Twinkie

[Smith6612]

Love marriage is the best way to go in my opinion. Arranged marriages of course are forced in a way and you never know how they're going to turn out. Love is selection/natural and if it doesn't turn out, it passes by without a problem most of the time.

[allinone]

I will opt for arranged love marriage.........coz thats better over all options. it did not make your parents embarassed also you take the taste of love before marriage. so its best to have love with your fiance which is arranged by your parents with your consent and enjoy the feelings of love with her before marriage by having good conversations, dates and all

[bawii]

I'm for love marriage, but then again, I don't think arranged marriages are bad either way, I agree with opine4me that they tend to be looked down upon in western cultures

there are many people in the world who wonder if they're ever going to find their significant other, and in society(which is such a broad term, so I'm going to restrict it to american society, cause I don't know much about other societies haha), there's this pressure that if you don't find the right one, you're destined to be lonely for eternity. it's in media such as movies, music, television, and commercials. there's always these fictitious characters that easily find their significant other while they're young and live happily ever after. marriage for love is a good idea, but it's extremely rare to find. people are so caught up in not wanting to be alone, they tend to rush things, and if things don't work out, they could always divorce, since everyone's doing it nowadays :/

in arranged marriages, you don't have to worry about the whole dating thing, and you honestly can learn to love people.

a marriage of true love would be ideal, but sadly enough, unlikely!